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Girls Gone Wild On Brisbane Tinder, Part V: The Birthday Edition

Warning: Language and Adult Content which may make parents of young women cry

Y’all pretend you read The Daily Chrenk for the articles, but I know that y’all really come here for the pictures. No need to be (too) ashamed; you’re not alone.

Since today is my birthday (don’t ask which one; it’s not a good number), consider this Friday’s edition of “Girls Gone Wild on Brisbane Tinder” my gift to you, with appreciation for ignoring all my worthwhile writing in favour of clickbait. You’re welcome. Previous parts here, here, here and here – and “Boys Gone Wild” here (keep ’em coming, my lady readers, for the sake of gender balance).

In this edition we pay particular tribute to the entrepreneurial spirit evident among so many young women. Perhaps none of them will (sadly) get the gong as Telstra’s Young Businesswoman of the Year, but kudos for trying.

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Particular kudos to the young lady above from Griffith University (the number one sugar baby university in Queensland) for wanting, to quote Dire Straits, money for nothing (but the chicks are definitely not free).

Worry not, gentlemen, you can still find your way to young ladies’ hearts in the absence of a big wallet, if you have big… pants.

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We all know the old saying that the shortest way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, but it seems that with some of the bright young things of Tinder it’s through the other end of the digestive system.

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Sometimes when you ride the back without a seat you can combine both passions. Just a thought.

Sometimes, Brisbane girls have very simple ambitions:

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Well, as long as you subscribe to Australian values!

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Mission accomplished. You’re welcome. Disappoint her even more and come to my birthday.

And last but not least:

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Couldn’t agree more. Would you like to see my library of 3,500 books?

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