“RAND PAUL: STUDYING SEXUAL TENDENCY OF QUAILS ON COCAINE IS WASTE OF GOVERNMENT SPENDING” – Possibly the headline of the year so far, after yesterday’s story of the year about a stork running a huge phone bill. In quail news:

“$356,000 was spent of your money studying whether or not Japanese quail are more sexually promiscuous on cocaine,” said Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY) in a speech on the Senate Floor.According to scientists, the effects of drugs like cocaine have similar brain effects in quails as in humans. The study looked at behavior patterns while on the drug and found “repeated exposure to cocaine during sexual activity may increase sexual motivation which may, in turn, may lead to high risk sexual activities.”

It’s a conclusion Sen. Paul calls predictable.

“Common sense would have told us one that cocaine is probably not good for you and that cocaine might make you do things that you wouldn’t have done otherwise had you not been on cocaine,” he said in a recent interview.

In the 2018 spending bill, the National Institutes of Health got more than 37 billion dollars – a $3 billion increase from the year before.

I have to agree with Rand here. I also worry about the sick, sick people in white coats who jack up innocent birds on coke and then watch them have sex with stranger birds.